Feeling Alive Is Simply

Feeling alive is when you least expect

that moment of truth

that brief moment of happiness

that could almost stroke

that naked flesh of your most inner

secret of existence

many facets of your persona seem to blend

shift, transform and translate

into layers of subconsciousness

yet they are so translucent

as transparent as the morning dew drop

on the first strand of your hair

that sweeps across your freshly washed subtle face

eyes, eyelashes, the blink of an eye

glides down gracefully

following the contour of your delicate cheek

right down to your moist but slightly quivering lips

The taste is almost familiar

The taste of a young heart beating in a lethargic body

The smell of a quivering mind over a solid spirit

The touch of an amber note of music

The music of the soul

That is what being alive is

simply all about

Heaven is just a distance away

In these two to three days time, great things are about to happen. My brother is getting married and this is our family very first church wedding - very surreal yet a sense of mysterious feeling of heaviness looms over me. I can't seem to comprehend the reason behind this. A day after that, I would be thrown into another world of a different nature - back to doing something a little less exciting as staying back home in KL, writing my blog, surfing the net and writing and running around town finishing up my projects, among other more seemingly insignificant chores, yet, have made up a big part of my life back here in KL. It feels like all these have become a structure of building blocks that I have stacked up myself, and once a piece of it is taken out of the whole balanced equation, the whole structure will just tumble down miserably. As much as I want to believe that I dislike living a fast pace city life, I am compelled to be drawn to it, involuntarily. Is it the never ending activities and entertainment you are constantly being bombarded with that makes the difference or could it just be the serenity I feel whenever I am back at my own little small home and my tiny secured yet vulnerable world of solitude? Nonetheless, if you ever have time, catch a movie like this Japanese one called Heaven's Bookstore and you will be pleasantly rewarded, emotionally, especially towards the end. Most Japanese films have a great build up to the ending of each film and the paid off is almost, always fulfilling. And they say all those who indulge in films or the world of moving images are fools and dreamers. Am I not one? The answer is almost a definite YES...

Venturing Vancouver - 2

Now I remembered the name of our first hotel we stayed in - The Buchan Hotel at Haro Street. This nostalgic and cozy hotel, built in 1926 was just within walking distance from Standley Park but since the space of the room was quite limited, Patrick found another hotel at Robson Street nearby. So, we checked out of Buchan the next day and moved into Robson Strasse Hotel instead. This bigger apartment-type hotel even came with an open kitchen, just what we needed at that time, and at a cheaper price too! Now, the boys had a bigger space to move around and Patrick started exploring this so called one of the most happening streets in Vancouver. He came back stocked up with loads of food from a convenient store just around the corner. We called a friend up and decided to meet in the next few days and all of us finally felt settled in eventually. One of the great treasures we discovered on Robson Street was also a fantastic Hong Kong restaurant called Hon's where they served big portions of Hong Kong dishes and take-aways. Ryan would love to sit at the window overseeing the snowy mountain peak and the hustle bustle street down below (he once spotted a skunk running across the street and jumped in excitement!) while Aidan started to take his wobbly baby steps around the hotel room. Meantime, I was busy surfing the food channels on TV. Since the weather was quite cold outside, the boys and I stayed in the hotel most of the time while Patrick ventured further till University of British Columbia on bus. The first bus trip we took as a family was a trip to downtown Chinatown where one could almost mistaken it for home. Faces of Asians, mainly Hongkies were everywhere. A familiar dialect (Cantonese) was floating in the air. It was quite a heartwarming feeling. The next few days, we went to Standley Park and visited the Vancouver Aquarium there. That was also the first time we saw those white beautiful gigantic baluga whales swimming gracefully in the aquarium, among many other species of animals compartmentalized into different sections and shows. It was definitely worth the experience for all of us. Now, come to think of it, this is a much better aquarium than the local one we visited last year for our KL aquarium costs a lot more comparatively, but with less species to look at. Good times did not last long for Ryan fell sick and had to go to the doctor. He lost quite a bit of weight but lucky enough, their spirit remained high and they had adjusted to the weather, place and time pretty well, very much to my surprise. Robson Street was indeed a happening place, lined with all sorts of boutiques, cafes, restaurants, hotels and many others. I had a chance to take an easy afternoon walk one day while the boys were sleeping. Everything seemed new yet exciting. What greeted me along the walkway were people in their best winter clothes (could not help myself but to check them out - the winter attires looked gorgeous! They came in all styles and textures) and a chilling winter breeze that could also freeze me momentarily if I were not in fact walking. I went back the hotel feeling great and almost feeling rejuvenated after staying in the hotel room for some time. Though the sun set but the people seemed to come alive even more and the street itself started to drown in the streams of vibrant and colourful lights, full of sights and sounds. You see people walking on the streets, hugging, panting, holding their hot coffees, rubbing their hands, sitting on benches, outside cafes, all in a chilling cold winter night. We even stopped to have a man from China made a sketch of Ryan for a mere C$10 on the street. Though to us, it cost quite a bit at that time but we were glad that we could contribute to his survival and art on the streets of a foreign land.

to be continued...

The world of Blogging

It's been a year since I started writing in this blog of mine. Have attempted a few times to give this little space of mine a look new, like trying to incorporate a new skin or something - like this one that has a lovely design to it but everytime, I ended up in disaster for I know not how html works. The more I changed, the further I moved away from my desired end result. It is very frustrating. As much as I tried, with very limited knowledge to change and adapt, it did not seem fruitful. All those html codes and all made me dizzy at the end of the day. Nonetheless, the world of blogging is definitely interesting. I love exploring graphics, moving things around, changing layouts and all. To me, it all falls into a nice package. Not only words, but pictures and graphics must all gel to give me the pleasure of the senses of the eye. I hope to improve and learn more to explore what I could do in the near future...this is a new attempt of mine! Hope it works. Some of the pictures from our Vancouver trip back in 2004 in a filmstrip style...have not figure out how to do that...ha ha, as usual, will try again!