The Day I was Born

It has just turned another year for me. What difference does it make, I now wonder. Am I any different from the year before? Have I accomplished more for the past twelve months of my life? I am not too sure. Nothing really significant that I could remember or recall. Maybe I have not stayed focus enough in the things that I would like to see myself doing or achieving. New year resolutions were never familiar words in my dictionary of Jen for I never believe in them. Short term goals, maybe. Feel as though I have not done enough for myself. But now it slowly begins to dawn on me. Yeah, it is this blog of mine. The one single significant thing that happened to me was that I started my own blog. I believe this is a good thing for it helps me to keep to a discipline of constant writing. It does not matter if anyone ever reads them, but at least I am writing and I hope to be able to continue doing so and have the persistence of stamina in writing. What is my birthday wish? Nothing in particular. I don't mind a cup of aromatic coffee, a piece of beautiful cake over long, intimate and unreserved real conversation with someone who matters to me and just forget about the rest of the world, just for that moment in time.

Venturing Vancouver - 1

Looking back, the most appalling yet adventurous thing that happened to us, a small family of four was getting ready to go to Vancouver in 2004. Ryan has just turned four and Aidan only two the year before. That was their very first long distance trip overseas. The flight took us from modern KLIA airport to Singapore Changi, then over to Incheon Airport at Seoul. The first minute we stepped out of the cockpit and into the walkway that led us to the airport, a cold icy air hit my face. All my senses were suddenly all wide awaken already. I could almost smell the excitement in the air. It was early February and Seoul was still very much in the midst of their winter season. It was just brief transit but both boys seemed to enjoy themselves. I was secretly praying that I could bump into the infamous Korean actor, Bae Yong-jun! (what a wishful thinking) Left we went and were back into another flight which would take us directly to Vancouver. I must say flying with Singapore Airline was the best flying experience I have ever had (not that I have flown that much at all up till then) - the comfort of good food, individual pampering of entertainment at hand all the time, with the latest movie selection, and music to listen to, great air stewardess services - I thought that was it. I would close my eyes and enjoy the rest of my flight to Canada. But, hey, I was not traveling alone, or was I? Aidan practically refused to be buckled up the whole time and started walking all over the plane. Whenever I tried to force him into his seat with me, he would cry and cry. Well, he practically cried almost throughout the whole more than 24-hour journey from Korea! I barely shut my eyes and was silently grumbling due to huge emotional distress. Ryan was a baby for he was happily enjoying watching Looney Tunes, the movie and ate whatever that was provided. Finally, a look out of the window and I was greeted by the first sunrise we saw over the Vancouver horizon and I knew my nightmare was almost coming to an end. Vancouver airport was pretty nice, but the officers were very strict. They checked everything and made sure whatever we had were in order. We hopped onto a cap and were immediately thrilled by the welcoming view of a new place. We followed the highways, passed by streets and streets of housing area, shop lots, all very neatly organized in blocks. The roads were all in grid form, very unlike KL! We were heading to West End area of Vancouver, somewhere near Robson Street. We checked into this cozy Inn which was pre-booked but realized that the room was too small for us, with huge luggage...and not much room for the kids to move around. But it was a nice and warm place to settle into. Right after that, we took to the streets and walked down further to the seaside to take in all the beauty that Vancouver was so famous for. Aidan had to be carried for he knew not how to walk yet. It was quite a walk but luckily, the pleasant weather made it bearable. A much laid back sort of feel hit you right away. People exercising, jogging, walking, just sitting on benches talking, people canoeing in the water and most of them there were just enjoying this exquisite morning. So were we. While taking in all these, it really struck me that, we have actually made it that far - Vancouver. It was truly remarkable.

To be continued...

When Love Is Too Much

What would happen when you realized that you have fallen in love with someone so deeply that you could no longer pull yourself out? Will love be just enough? Watching Leon The Professional (1994) again, by Luc Besson just the other day made me wonder how love can be a dangerous thing. No doubt, it is still one of my favourite films of all time for I truly believe this is Luc Besson's best work that I have seen (Though I did not watch LaFemme Nikita), but I am comparing it with his other works like 5th Element or Joan of Arc. "A perfect assassin. An innocent girl. They have nothing left to lose except each other. He moves without sound. Kills without emotion. Disappears without trace. Only a 12 year old girl... knows his weakness". This is the tagline for the film. A remarkable film in terms of characterizations of the two leads. The quirky and definitely awkward relationship they have in the midst of chaotic "cleanings" and the action sequences and impeccable music made this film a must watch all the time. It is amazing how Natalie Portman, a first timer in the film, and at such a young age, exudes such natural confidence, yet still maintain the innocence and confusions of a growing up girl in a disturbing family. Top notch talent in acting. Looking at her again, now in a much recent film (2004) by Mike Nicols - CLOSER - she has come a long way in her acting career. CLOSER, to me, is a very honest film (though full of obscene words, not exactly my cup of tea) in trying to explore the ever complicated issues in relationships of adults. Yes, I do agree with the poster, having a statement being "At Last, A Love Story for Adults" by TIMES. It is quite smartly written and skillfully portrayed by actors like Jude Law, Julia Roberts and Clive Owen. I love the crudeness that it has in dealing with the difficulty of love between two people, especially one of obsession, lies and betrayal. Not too bad a film though not perfect. Hey, aren't love not perfect after all?

A Good Get Together Tho Not So Complete

Last Saturday was a day that I strive to pull most of my good old friends from Octopus Online together - Sidney, Joey, Gary, Fung, Eugene, and Yen Leng. It has been a very long time since we came out for our usual makan ritual while we were still colleague back then. These were the bunch of friends who stuck together for most of the lunches and meals we used to have near HVD in Cheras since 1998, these were the people who worked hard to make something matters through an entertainment website once called Octopus, sphereheaded by Eugene, these were also the gang who enjoyed endless teh tarik in between works and sat through those sessions, simply talking about films and things that seemed to matter to us back then. These were also the same gang who turned up for our wedding more than six years ago. Those time seemed so far from us all now, now that some of us are all caught up in our own separate works, family commitments, and the many other things we need to accomplish in life, in order to just pull through. Sometimes, I just can't help but feeling a little sad, for we no longer have time for the small little details in life - things that what make friends much closer to one another, like talking endlessly and passionately about films over a cup of hot teh tarik with a special friend - which seem so insignificant in the bigger, so called more responsibility-driven daily activities where we try to just make ends meet.That night, I only managed to get Sid and Gary with his wife, Catherine and adorable daughter, Isabelle to come for a simple dinner at Kluang Railway Station, but to me, that was a real good get together already. I wish the next time, it would be a much better turn out. But Gary is still the same old chatty guy, except that he is now a passionate and devoted father. Sid is still very much involved in his creative work of arts, comics, paintings, his love for films (and making them) though much of his old straightforwardness had seemed to diminish...

Walk The Line

Walk The Line (2005)
Starring Joaquin Phoenix as Johnny Cash and Reese Witherspoon as June Carter Cash

The fact that I had watched this film before the Oscars did give a better impact or feel to my whole impression of the film. Somehow, I had a hunch that Reese would win Best Actress in the academy. Phoenix and Reese were definitely tremendous in this piece. I love that whole idea of how human struggle through their devotion and perseverance in the things that they love to do in life. Though at times, you may be drowned by your own obsession of fame and glory, while trying to cope with it at the same time, it still shines through in the face of hopeful genuine love between two people. The singing is of course, a plus point to the film. I admire June's sincere and down to earth philosophy towards life and her strength to stand tall as a woman of dignity in those trying times of her failing previous marriage. I guess no matter what time of age you are in, we as women will always need to be strong to face any challenges thrown to us, especially by society at large, as how society see and expect us to behave and conform to the preconceived notion of women in general

A Worthwhile Project

Exactly one week from this day, I was up and running with a project which I have been involved in since August last year. Last week today was the grand finale of the event held at KLPac. Looking back, it was a tremendous journey, almost felt like a marathon that I have taken, but not a moment exhausting and tiring for I had the opportunity to work with the most pleasurable client that one producer could ever hoped for, surrounded by talented people who are passionate in what they do and what they believe in, and therefore translated in the results of their hard work and commitment. To top it of, this entire internationally renowned event, from a brand name that is well recognized from all around the world, was single-handedly helmed by 3 great women, working closely as a team to make it a success. No event management company to take up the whole project and take care of all the nitty gritty details of an event, but these 3 extremely dedicated and abled women themselves to coordinate it from top till the bottom. I salute them for in them I could see their enthusiasm in the project, and how much women can do and how far we could achieve in this working world. By the way, HAPPY WOMEN'S DAY!

The Most Perfect Sunset

A journey not to be forgotten. One of the most rewarding experiences from all the Kedah trip so far was the most recent one. Together with my father-in-law and some of his friends, we took a ride out of SP town one bright and hot afternoon. Passing endless padi fields on both side of the road to arrive at a small village, we finally stopped right at a small jetty by the river. Apparently, we were supposed to see a yacht owned by a fella from Germany but we only managed to catch a glimpse of it from where we were standing. I was not much interested in looking at that but to walk over to the planks and right up till the end of the jetty to look at the fishing boats dotting the river bank and see how the water is. That whole feeling reminded me so much of a trip I once had while I was still studying in Penang. That fishing village is called Muka Head, but is more famously known as "The End of The World". It is situated right at the end of all those fancy hotels saturated the coastal line of the infamous Batu Feringgi Beach and this place gives you the serenity you could only dream of, and the view to the wide open sea it offers is priceless. I have always loved a long stretch of planks trailing off into the sea for I would imagine myself satisfying my crazy urge of simply running as fast as I can down the planks and just leap into the cold icy water of the sea, plunging myself into the whole eternity between the heaviness of sanity and the weightlessness of the imaginative mind. That must be fantastic!

After a while, we left the place and headed to the nearest town called Tanjung Dawai. It is also a fishing village but a more populated one. Here, we stopped and ate the heartiest seafood dinner I have ever eaten in my entire life (even better than Bukit Tambun, in some ways). After a heavy meal, I strolled to the nearest jetty (a concrete one) and was in time to catch the sunset...to my amazement, I could only watched in awe and silence as I glued my eyes right on the fiery red planet over the sky and a few fishing boats happened to draw near the horizon. That moment in time when a fishing boat crisscrossed with the descending sun over the sea was indeed a single moment that I could only wish that I had a camera with me to capture the whole beauty of it all...it is the feeling of blissfulness that one could hardly come by these days. It is the simplicity of life itself that one often fail to cherish when we tend to live life on a faster lane. I know, I am one.

That was, for me, one hell of a sunset! When the sun finally disappeared into the horizon, my moment in time has also passed me by, but at least, I thought to myself, I was there.